Don't cry for me Argentina...

There wasn't much crying in Argentina during my sojourn last weekend to the Argentinean city of Mendoza just the other side of the Andes from Chile. However I can imagine there may have been a few tears in Santiago during my absence as Eduardo and Jonathan have separated, now there are only 2 of us in the flat. I almost feel sorry for Eduardo (almost!!) but I can more than imagine various reasons for not stickin it out with Ed'. It's a shame really Jonathan was a nice guy and almost made it bearable living with Eduardo, I now have to face him alone.

I made the Andean crossing to Argentina with two guys both called Mark from Sydney, however we very nearly didn't make it at all. We had planned to leave on Thursday and arrived at the border early evening only to be told that the border had been closed 15 minutes earlier because with all the snow and ice it was too dangerous to let anymore vehicles through; so 3 hours later we found ourselves back in Santiago- 6 hours on a bus to end up where we started! The Friday we tried again leaving Santiago at 7 in the morning, arriving at the border to find the border open and the weather in our favour. However Mark or as I will refer to him "Markbeth" (due to his likeness to Shakespeare's character) had forgotten his passport and couldn't cross into Argentina... What did we do?....give up?.... no! we bribed the immigration officials!! for the price of 2 hotdogs and 2 bottles of coke Markbeth was allowed to pass. It was definitely the dodgiest and funniest thing I have been a party to since being here. To think that by buying the officials their lunch you can enter the country!!

Our actual time in Argentina was very "tranquilo" (easy-going), we saw Star Wars joined a couple of winery tours and gorged ourselves on the biggest Argentinean steaks you have ever seen. On the Sunday night we attended an all you can eat Argentinean BBQ restaurant for the equivalent of $7.50 Australian and I kid-you-not there were people with a whole cow on their plates. For some length of time we were doing our own thing and I took the opportunity to aimlessly wander around the town, perusing the markets and in one moment of cultural inspiration I decided to take a look in the museum of modern art, however once entering found myself at a choir recital (don't worry I was confused as well). The choir was very impressive, although I was disappointed not to have heard "Don't cry for me Argentina" and considered offering to give them my rendition of "Argentina, what's it like to lose a war?" which although a classic I concluded may have been inappropriate.

We were due to return on Monday so that I'd be back in Santiago to complete some work I had due on Tuesday. However wouldn't you know it, we got on the bus at the bus station and sat there for half an hour until they herded us all off again explaining that the border was closed again. We had an extra day in Argentina, I wasn't going to be able to hand my work in and basically the situation was inconvenient to say the least. Eventually we left on Tuesday and just when I thought things were going to be pretty straight forward the bus pulls over and stops. The driver aided by some old geezer who'd appeared changed a tyre; I don't know if you've ever seen someone changing a bus tyre but I certainly hadn't and until this trip hadn't realised how amusing it can be to see a few grown men and the odd old age pensioner struggling with a wheel over half their height (for the record I didn't offer to help, I was more than happy to watch and laugh as I had by this point developed a slight hatred of this particular bus company).

Having changed the tyre/wheel we continued towards Chile and threw ourselves straight into the biggest traffic jam of buses, trucks, tractors and the occasional mule that I have ever seen. We crawled along at a snails pace for over 6 hours; this turned what should be a 7 hour trip between Mendoza and Santiago into a 15 hour ordeal. Finally arriving back at the border we knew that we were going to be confronted by the same problem caused by the absence of Markbeth's passport and had formed a contingency plan, a plan that basically consisted of secreting Markbeth back onto the bus amidst the chaos that is the Los libertadores border crossing if he was refused entry back into Chile.

As it happens he was told that he wasn't going to be able to enter Chile and that because he had no travel documents whatsoever he had essentially been an illegal immigrant for the past 4 days (does that make me a people smuggler?). We were about to resort to the contingency plan when the Argentine official made some subtle signals- another bribe was on the cards. This time it cost Markbeth a tad more than simply lunch for a few fat Argentines, 50 Argentine pesos to be exact (A$25), but at least he got back into the country and boy was I glad that I'd now been party to 2 bribes; in my mind an essential South American experience.

Not much else to report now, hope all are well. Before we do part though it probably warrants a mention that if I shed any tears over the last weekend it would have been for the death of a football club; One man (and an American at that) owning what really amounts to a social institution is sacrilege. For over a hundred years many of the greatest football clubs in the world have been at the heart of many peoples social and sporting lives in the UK, if today a dollar value can be put on that sort of thing then in my mind it has ceased to live.

Ciao for now.

Stranger things have happened?...probably not.

The family, originally uploaded by Thearley.

The concoction of various illicit substances, numerous late nights and a few too many piscos (Chilean national drink- a vile substance distilled from sweetened grapes of which I hope to smuggle a few bottles back into oz) has taken its toll on Eduardo and the lads. They've all been behaving quite oddly recently, actually I ought to really say "odder" since they were all pretty odd in the first place.

I returned to my hovel from uni earlier this week to be greeted by Jonathan who offered to show me his collection of gay porn on his laptop- an offer I strangely declined. Jonathan works (unlike his partner Eduardo) for IBM and has quite a flash laptop which he seems to use exclusively for downloading music and gay porn; I'm not sure whether IBM would approve!

I ought to correct myself here, as I have been referring to the laptop in the present tense when in fact I should be referring to it in the past. Jonathan was walking home from work a few days later and was mugged at gunpoint, the lucky fellow managed to get away with the laptop, complete I assume with the enviable collection of gay porn! It's quite ironic really, since regular readers will recall my last posting which referred to my encounter with a young hooligan, which by comparison with Jonathans ordeal is obviously a little tame, however I (if not Ed and Jonathan) have seen the funny side.

Moving along, the same day that I turned down the gay porn exhibition I also found Eduardo singing to his "plant". He probably doesn't need to sing to it as it has grown considerably since I have been here. I asked him the other day when he planned to "harvest" and smoke its "fruit", apparently though it needs to grow for almost another year and he plans to set up some artificial lights and things to help it continue growing; so in the near future I could be living in the next room to a drug lab.

Lastly you will notice that finally I have managed to upload a Chilean photo, this taken a few nights ago was the German couple's last night in Santiago so we had a little fiesta for them. The photo is of what Jens refers to as "the family"; those of us who have lived together for the past couple of months. Eduardo and Jonathan are the parents (Ed definitely being the mother) and the three of us they treat as children; I am really fed up with Ed's lectures on all things from the royal family (significant to Chile?- I think not) to how he hates Tio Sam (Uncle Sam; USA). Soon after this photo was taken I wanted another taken with Eduardo and the plant atop his head like a crown, I lifted it high into the air and forgetting how tall it had grown I bent it against the cieling. It now looks quite impotent, however I think it will live. Nonetheless Eduardo was quite upset and we haven't spoken much since. Pathetic little man, just wait until I leave in July- on my last day I am going to feed his "pet" a little poison, teach the bugger a lesson.

All for now, Be in touch again soon, have a good weekend all and GO THE CHEFS!!!

Pasting averted, but I remain hopeful.

Greetings to all those who continue to subject themselves to my South American diaries. Please forgive my recent tardiness in posting, however almost unbelievably there hasn't really been anything worth writing about these past two weeks. Pleased to see an English side in the Champions league final (even if it is Liverpool)... could have been worse though I suppose; thank god its not Chelsea- I don't think I could ever back Chelsea and I am not sure how I'd have felt if I'd found myself backing AC Milan- can't stand italian sides! Incidentally can anyone give me an Iron Chefs update- does the Windsor Castle still rock to the anthem "our restaurant rules" or is it more a case of washing the dishes to pay for your grub? Since being here I've not actually played any football, a situation I hope to correct soon. There are whispers around the uni of a Chilean XI vs The Rest of the World match which somehow I've been nominated to organise. To be honest though I can't see it happening, organising anything here takes at least a year- efficiency isn't their strong point. Nonetheless I try to keep fit and trim in the gym at the uni 2 or 3 times a week, so hopefully that'll prepare me for an Iron Chefs comeback in the near future. Its taken a while, but I've finally been attacked! I was beginning to fear that my time in South America would be marred by the absence of a good Latin style mugging- always a hoot! I use the word "attack" loosely here, it was more of a confrontation and I haven't any physical injuries to substantiate my claim. I was walking back to the El Departamento Loco (the crazy flat) from a salsa class I'd been to at another establishment (not the Jose Luis Tejo school, which I've left due to the somewhat high nature of the fees) when I was approached by a group of 5 obviously Borracho (drunk) youths (about 17 or 18 in age I'd hazard a guess). 4 of them more or less ignored me, but 1 (theres always 1) walked straight at and into me and started screaming profanities about 2 inches from my face. Now I might be a little hard at hearing, but the chap didn't really need to shout and naturally I felt a little uncomfortable getting so close to a guy I'd only just met (we hadn't even had coffee!), he was taking it all a little too fast for my liking. So I expressed my objection by grasping his collar and telling him in no uncertain terms that I am not an easy girl; my actual words were more along the lines of "get out of my fucking face"- I can be a nasty bugger at times, but you know what it's like when the old adrenaline kicks in. Anyway by this point his chums had taken an interest in the proceedings and it looked like I'd get a pasting if I hung around, so I made a beeline for the relative safety of the flat. It was a pity really, I've really felt like giving someone a good whack some days, it becomes tedious having things whispered about you as you walk past or shouted at you as a car drives past, but unfortunately this is a reality for people like me who are so obviously foreign in Chile. Having said all this though I must point out that I've also been fortunate enough to meet some really nice Chileans as well. Not much else to report, I remain grateful to those of you who continue to stay in touch with me. Also I feel I ought ask, Hoogster are you suffering some sort of mid life crisis? The somewhat emotional nature of some of your recent posts has concerned me! (those interested should visit www.hoogster.blogspot.com). Be in touch soon Ps. Rob I am looking into Adriana Lima for u.