Thearley

Goodness Gracious Me!! It's www.thearley.blogspot.com

Friday, July 01, 2005

If your queer and you know it and you really want to show it, then you've now got a reason to clap your hands.

This week saw the historic passing of bills in both Canada and Spain legalising gay marriage. In Spain, a typically catholic country the bill went one step further and allowed gay couples to adopt children also (this may have been the case in Canada also, however I have not read anything confirming that).

The stage now seems set for an orgy of similar behavior all over the globe, some prominent gay rights activists in Australia have called for the Raunchy Revolution to begin and in Chile the gayness continues as normal (according to my cohabitant Jorrit the Dutchman, Eduardo had a male prostitute in the bathroom to fix his pipes yesterday). This really shouldn't bother the Dutch though as they were one of the first countries to embrace same sex marriage and as regular readers will I am sure be aware a fellow "blogger" Hoogster of Dutch descent has famously dethroned himself of his closet several times.

After the Dutch set the trend in 2001, Belgium who has to do everything that Holland does (in fact I think Belgium fancies Holland) followed suit in 2003. The Scandinavian countries (who took free love little too far in the 60s and have never looked back) have a system of registered partnerships which just falls short of a marriage, but one can imagine that it's only a matter of time until they take it the whole way.

Recently deposed Australian football coach Frank Farina has in rumours been linked with clubs in the Spanish Primera Liga, citing the ability to stroll sunny mediterranean beaches amongst buff bronzed bodies and watch his latin charges prance about the Nou Camp or the Bernabeu wearing gay hair bands Frank said frankly "the opportunity to coach in Spain would be simply fab but I've also had an approach from Queer eye for the straight guy to take over the role as the FashionFag (horrid green&gold tracksuits for all) so I have to weigh up my options". Later queeried about the prospect of coaching in Canada Frank responded in the negative "too many guys with pasty white legs for my liking", he probably has a point though; pasty white guys in flashy white boots is perhaps not a good look.

Conservatives have predictably been quick to damn the new legislation, in typical conservative fashion damning all the vile sinners to hell. However a spokesman for the devil later announced that hell was getting a bit full and they wouldn't be taking anymore homosexuals since the right honourable Lord Satan desired an equilibrium from all cultural, racial, socio-economic and sexual groups, the spokesman added that they were particularly looking for sinners from white, conservative, middle class homes.

A crisis then seems set to grip decent society, with homosexuals barred from hell (temporarily at least, since it won't take long for hell to fill up with white, conservative, middle class sinners) where are they all to go? Asked whether some could be detoured to heaven St. Peter said that the good Lord was unavailable for comment and that his chief spokesman Jesus was on holiday in Ibiza with a close pal Gabriel, however he did suggest that John Howard might be willing to take some into his fab holiday homes at Baxter, Port Hedland and Villawood.

Radicals have suggested that we could all just tolerate them (the homosexuals, not the radicals). Such suggestions provoked a White House statement in which George Bush declared a war on tolerance citing the proliferation of Weapons of Mass Seduction(WMS) as a threat to our very way of life. But really shouldn't we be striving for a better way of life? is this really as good as it gets? Bring on the tolerance and the WMS I say.

5 Comments:

  • At 12:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Im sure most people will agree when I say there is nothing wrong with gayness.

    Afterall, we are all good mates with Hoogster.

     
  • At 11:23 AM, Blogger Hoogster said…

    HEY !!!!!
    SHUT UP!!!!!!

    I AM NOT GAY.

    MAYBE A GAY FAGGOT BUT THATS IT.
    (in case you morons don't get it, the two words mean the same thing meaning that they contradict each other. meaning im straight.)

     
  • At 2:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Nick's in denial again

    John that post challenged rob for most confusing blog post ever.

     
  • At 9:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    John, I am very happy to inform you that the Chefs last night undoubtedly played there best ever game in beating these italian jacks schuma 6-1

    John, seriously we wooped there ass....best players

    Asikas played well, followed by Asikas who was good in defence and then finally Asikas finished off well up forward.

    hahaha

    6-1 Johnny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Afro

     
  • At 11:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    ...but you wear black boots...

     

Post a Comment

<< Home